Creep of the Week - July 19, 1997

Image: Andrew Cunanan

Andrew Cunanan
"At Least He's Not a Cheap Homosexual Prostitute"

It's tough to become famous in the gay serial killer business these days. Andrew Cunanan, 27, has been on the FBI's Most Wanted List for over a month, charged with killing four guys in three states (two of whom were his ex-lovers) and stealing each of their cars to drive to the next victim, but had you ever heard about him until this week? No. His picture has been hanging up at your local Post Office, but did you ever go down there and check it out? Apathy like that makes aspiring murderers furious! It was only after he walked up to Italian fashion designer Gianni Versace at his Miami Beach home and shot him twice in the head that Andrew was able to make front page headlines. Now he's the subject of a world-wide manhunt by as many as 400 federal agents who are tightening airport security, distributing photographs and alerting places frequented by homosexuals like gay bars and Disney World.

People who have known Andrew or known of him describe him with words and phrases like happy-go-lucky, handsome, gregarious, lavish, boastful, party boy and gigolo with no visible means of support.

Always that religious-upbringing aspect in these cases. Speaking of which, Andrew raises a dilemma for the Southern Baptists. "We're sort of AC/DC on this one," says a spokesman, "Killing is sinful, being gay is sinful, but we're still awaiting a clarification from God on whether killing gays is. They weren't persuaded to repent by AIDS or our threats of fire and brimstone - maybe Andrew can scare them into it." Well, someone's found the silver lining.

For now, Andrew is still on the loose. The FBI says he's a master of disguise, something they became experts at back in the days of J. Edgar Hoover's cross-dressing parties. Get down to that Post Office and look at those pictures for your own protection, regardless of your sexual orientation. Stay away from hookers of either gender, don't wear Italian suits, and think about calling your mother to smooth out any lingering disputes. If you make the front page bad news someday, maybe she'll be kinder to you in the press than Andrew's mother was to him.


Let me know what you think at montgome@servtech.com

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