Creep of the Week - May 25, 1996

Bill Clinton

I've been willing to give Bill the benefit of the doubt on this sexual harassment lawsuit. His accuser, Paula Jones, seems like your typical seven-day-a-week ignorant slut who's trying to cash in on her one encounter with fame. Her story is hard to believe, and she didn't help her credibility by waiting so long to come forward. If she was indeed confronted with the gubernatorial gonads, I'm sure she wasn't nearly as shocked and damaged as she would have us believe.

But if Bill wasn't a Creep then, he is now. This week, in one of the legal motions he's been filing to keep this affair from getting to court while he's still president, he claimed that he should be immune from Paula's charges because his position as Commander-in-Chief gives him the same protection from lawsuits as those serving active military duty. This obtuse argument not only justifiably outraged Veteran's groups (on Memorial Day weekend, no less) but also played right into the only possible campaign issue that can make Bob Dole look good - the "I served my country and you didn't" routine.

And that's as gentlemanly as this campaign is going to get. It'll be all downhill from here:

Bill: "Oh yeah? You got a divorce and I didn't"
Bob: "Your wife is a Barbra Streisand-loving liberal femi-nazi"
Bill: "You're older than the bedrock I met your wife on last night"

You get the idea. And we haven't even heard from Perot yet. Five more months, folks. Hope we make it.

Let me know what you think at montgome@servtech.com

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